Certain to be controversial, I hope this is thought provoking at least.
All of us who are paying attention know these are unusual, even extraordinary times. It logically follows that extraordinary things ought to be considered. Business as usual is gonna lead to a quicker fall that might otherwise be the case.
When RvW fell and numerous states’ so-called trigger laws came into force women started to die. Yes, they died because of the laws. But an argument can be made that they died because healthcare providers, who are sworn to help people, let them die because of their fear of the laws. Was it the right thing to do? What’s right and what’s wrong in a situation like this?
Now we have the OD (orange demon) cutting off funds that have already been legally set aside to be spent. People who don’t get the help they were counting on from programs legally authorized will now die. Yes, they’ll die because of the OD’s evil actions. But how about the finance professionals in the government who push the buttons that generate the payments? You may not know this unless you’ve served in one of those jobs, but it is not like a bank account without overdraft protection. It’s not like the payments will bounce. The payments will go thru. But they won’t process them because of fear of the OD.
Our society is careening towards the abyss. People will eventually have to overcome their fears and do the right thing. How long will it take and how many more will die? We will only know in the fullness of time.
I was thinking I’d have to rethink my position on Germans in the pre/WWII era. I always believed they were a weak and despicable people to have stood by and watched the Jews and others being rounded up and sent off. I was thinking now in America as similar things are happening and we are standing by and watching it…well, what can people do? I thought there’s really nothing that can be done to stop this…and so it was probably similar in Germany. So, maybe they weren’t so weak and despicable. They were like us and we’re not weak and despicable. And then the light came on. I don’t have to rethink my position on the Germans of that era. I just have to acknowledge that we Americans are weak and despicable like them.
Now, of course, there were exceptions in Germany. There were people who stood up and who often times lost their lives because of it. I’d hope there will exceptions in America too. And I expect they will also pay a high price, maybe even with their lives. But, I’d also expect that as a people we will stand by and watch millions be sent off.
For those who don’t see the parallel and who think these migrants aren’t being sent off to the gas chambers to die. Don’t kid yourselves. Many of them will die who would not have otherwise.
Knowing that a number of folks will think me even more crazy than they already do I still post this. If that’s your instinct, please refrain from ad hominem attacks and just ignore me instead.
So, these objects in the skies over America are capturing people’s imaginations. Perhaps the smartest person I know who happens to be a brilliant aerospace engineer turned me onto some fascinating info a couple years ago that led me to some deep dives into the subject of UFOs. Perhaps the most interesting warning that came from the ‘research’ I did was one having to do with just this sort of phenomena taking places in our skies.
The UFO folks have convincing info to make one believe in the possibility that our govt. has recovered alien spacecraft and have used reverse engineering to develop undisclosed tech that would revolutionize the way energy is produced among other things. They’ve also, it is supposed, created significant numbers of craft using that tech and periodically send them into our skies on test runs. Test runs with what purpose…well, one theory is that a simulated attack will be launched at some point with the purpose being to trigger either a war or a massive increase in government spending to counter this ‘alien’ threat.
I asked a man approaching 90 a question at the dinner table on Thanksgiving. I commented that he had 25 years on me and said I wondered if he felt like I did about the topic I was going to broach. I confessed that it troubled me greatly that my generation – the boomers – were leaving behind a world that was barreling towards a climate catastrophe that would kill off 100s of millions. I asked him if he thought his generation bore any responsibility. I asked him how he felt about it and how he thought people his age thought about these things.
His answer began with a recollection that there were no jet airplanes when he was a kid. He ruminated about how Eisenhower built the interstate system and how fantastic it was to be able to drive long distances quickly. Then he said we’d just seen the last supermoon of the year a couple weeks ago recalling, connected in his mind, how in the 60s we put a man on the moon. I said, yes, we had a good run didn’t we.
The conversation drifted away from my question then. But it was clear he thought given all the advances that had taken place in his lifetime…who could complain. I wasn’t surprised I guess. In fact it made me recollect a conversation I had with a friend my age that took a turn like that when I lamented how our fossil fuel industry had been subsidized for so long even after everyone knew it was killing the planet. He said something to the effect of.. but, don’t you realize how good our lives have been because of cheap oil.
What an incredibly selfish and sad time we live in. I guess we can be thankful for the good run we had. We’re all that matters.
Last nite we had dinner with some friends. I was relaying the events I described below and my voice caught. The thoughts a young woman shared at a chance dinner party had been haunting me. I said they haunted me and the words caught in my throat. I managed to carry on the conversation but I could have as easily burst open, a sobbing mess.
A few weeks ago:
We had dinner last nite with a couple who are close friends of ours. Their two daughters were home for the holidays and one had brought a close female friend of hers home with her. All of them joined us for dinner. The three younger folks were all Ivy League grads and the conversation was spirited.
All of us had spent significant periods of time working, traveling and living in developing foreign countries. Those experiences make one less insular than the typical American. With that open-mindedness nearly invariably comes an empathy not found much in the red states our friends and we inhabit. It was a fine, spiritually refreshing evening.
Two of the three young women were pursuing graduate degrees and the 3rd had only recently completed her BA. All were hoping to do work related to environmental sustainability.
One of the young women had spent considerable time working with indigenous populations in Colombia. She’d traveled with a group of these women to the COP in Glasgow. She spoke of her friends who were involved in more direct action as well.
I asked her if the corporate-driven legislative actions to criminalize activism, both here and abroad, had dampened spirits. Her answer was unexpected and it struck me, rattled me.
She said no, spirits hadn’t been diminished by making them into felons. She said most identified as nihilists. Our host, the father of her friend was incredulous not immediately seeing how a nihilist and activist could be co-resident. Not pausing very long to absorb her host’s comments, she continued to explain that they all know there’s no path to species’ survival – but, what else could they do? Implied was that when you know, you know. And knowing demands action.
I paraphrased what I’d heard and said so, it’s like throwing yourselves against the machine. I’d thought about Mario Savio’s Machine Speech standing on the steps at Berkeley. Words spoken when I was 3 years old but which spoke to me when I heard it decades later.
“There is a time when the operation of the machine becomes so odious, makes you so sick at heart, that you can’t take part; you can’t even passively take part, and you’ve got to put your bodies upon the gears and upon the wheels, upon the levers, upon all the apparatus, and you’ve got to make it stop. And you’ve got to indicate to the people who run it, to the people who own it, that unless you’re free, the machine will be prevented from working at all!”
She didn’t show that she’d connected to the vision the words that came to me conjured. But she didn’t reject my interpretative metaphor. Our conversation shifted to things less weighty and the evening wrapped up not long after.
Today again:
But here I am weeks later playing it over and over again.
After I’d finished the story last nite, the wife of the incredulous father said she was not as hopeless as the young women or I. And she recounted how her students in middle school recognized what was happening and she hoped were someday going to make amends. She said she couldn’t be hopeless because she had children.
I asked her if it was a clear-eyed hope. She said she didn’t know. But I think she did.
She also commented that we can all make a difference with our personal habits. To that I recounted that many observers have credited the notion that individuals can make a significant dent to the success of corporate/oligarchic gas-lighting to distract from their actions. The host this night nodded in agreement and the conversation moved on.
And we all move on. Some hoping against all odds and others hopeless – all just doing the best we can.
The turn of events that’s led to Bernie endorsing Biden and calling his supporters irresponsible if they don’t do the same has led me to do some soul searching.
I’ve concluded that the vast majority of folks shaming Bernie supporters – for being slow to get on the Biden bandwagon or even outright declaring that they never will – have probably not lifted a finger to advance progressive politicians since Trump got elected. I’m not talking about cracking wise on social media about shit. I’m talking about actually spending time on the phone trying to educate/convince voters, texting them, knocking on their doors, contributing money, going to meetings, marches, campaign events….and encouraging others to do the same. I’m convinced that most are comfortable members of what’s left of the middle class. They’re the kinds of folks who might find a tweet that hit home for me this morning offensive.
Obama sold us “Hope and Change” and used the profits to invest in “Fuck You I Got Mine”
I hate Trump so much that I’ve often said if given the opportunity I would have no qualms judging someone who gutted him like a fish as a national hero. So, for someone to tell me that to not support Biden is to support Trump just pisses me off to no end. For me it is crystal clear that Biden will be trounced worse than Clinton was – meaning that the yammering no-action Biden supporters are the ones who are the de facto Trump supporters….they fail to realize that they are such a small segment of society and worse they are do nothings …meaning that multiplying their numbers by the efforts they are willing to put forth equals a big nothing burger.
I will vote for Biden. It won’t matter because I live in South Dakota. But, it’s the right thing to do vice sitting it out or voting for someone without a chance. I desperately hope that enough people vote for Biden to dislodge Trump. That said, I won’t spend any of my dwindling time working to support Biden and I won’t give a penny of my money to him either. Now that Bernie’s gone full Democrat regardless of their moral bankruptcy, I’m actively trying to decide where my time and money may have the best chance of advancing progressive ideals.
There are so many
things to spout about one hardly know where to begin. I’ve missed
being able with just a couple of clicks to send off into the ether an
interesting article or piece of music or some other as interesting
thing. That a simple effort such as that might touch hundreds of
people is surely the most virtuous of social media’s
characteristics. But that the ill it does outweighs that trait I
have no doubt.
What’s been pricking me most over the past couple days is the distraction machine’s use of the progressive left’s supposed anti-Semitism to take the eye of the people off of anything that might be of importance. So, a neophyte politician who happens to be a black progressive Muslim former refugee – everything the establishment hates – dares to not only think but say maybe we oughta look at spending $8 million per day supporting a regime that is committing genocide against a native population. Hmmm, we can’t have that.
Watching MSM toady
Chuck Todd interview the congresswoman daughter of a war criminal on
his show on Sunday as she managed to use the label anti-Semite and
Omar together at least 3 or 4 times….it reminded me of why I watch
so little of the garbage that passes for news anymore. I did take
pleasure in thinking about what I’d want to ask that despicable
excuse for a human being – so, how does it feel to know your daddy
can’t travel outside the good ol USA without fearing being locked
up for the crimes he’s committed? So, maybe it was worth it.
I choose to think
that woke people will come together to deal with the way our
country’s elected old guard officials are pissing away our
collective futures. It pushes into the background the waves of
despondency that come. If only for awhile. One of my biggest fears
is that one of the hate filled losers living on the fringes and
lapping up Trump’s rhetoric will become the 21st
century’s first Lee Harvey Oswald or Sirhan Sirhan or James Earl
Ray. I say first because there are nearly certain to be multiple
assassination attempts on the new leaders who have dared to challenge
the power structures. My fervent hope is that there will no need for
others who step forward to lead in their absence because good will
triumph.
– as Mohammed, the
laconic and wise driver who used to take me around Abuja when I
worked their 20 years ago, used to routinely say, insha’Allah.
I’ve been on a
break from social media for a week or so now and it feels really
good.
Over the past couple
years I have easily spent over an hour a day and sometimes much
longer reading thru mostly garbage to sift out nuggets of genuinely
worthwhile material. Lately though the garbage and the way it makes
me feel has become too much. It makes me mostly feel sad and that
price is too high for the nuggets.
The trigger for
having left is only the accumulation of tiny drips that left my cup
overflowing. The profound ugliness coming coming from all right
sides has not let up and will not let up as there is such hate behind
it that it’s unstoppable. The pigs are so full of themselves and
proud of what they’ve been handed that their fear of having it
diminished in any way – thru a sharing of their treasures – scares
them to the depths of their non-existant souls. And so their
boorishness can’t help but ooze out.
The proof to anyone
wondering if there is a God is so concretely obvious in the
selfishness of these degenerates as to fit the very definition of
unimpeachable. They willfully lie and spew their untruths to advance
their agendas with no apparent concern for honor – and yet many of
them believe themselves honorable largely for having worn a uniform
decades ago. Despicable is too kind a characterization.
Ok, I get that I
could just block most of the ugliness out and revel in my echo
chamber as I mine for the shiny jewels. But the ugliness would just
keep bleeding through. I’ve concluded, it feels like a conclusion
anyway, that it’s not something I want to see anymore. What was
it worth anyway? I indeed did tell myself that challenging the
sickness and speaking out was doing something, however tiny, to
….resist I suppose. Realizing my efforts may have only been
fooling myself is a gift I’m learning to be comforted by giving
myself.
I haven’t taken up the pen for a posting here in a long time. While no illusions of a personal legacy feel as though they could be remotely legitimate, a death prompted this. It was of a man I’d only met once – my girlfriend’s uncle. He was to be 90 soon.
Harold’s heart gave out with sufficient warning that all he cared to say goodbye to had their chance. A couple weeks before he left the uniqueness of his transition was signaled. His brothers were summoned to the hospital room and only them – their wives could visit with family in the less sterile waiting room while their men’s private goodbyes were accomplished.
Harold had lived a full life and not pretending to know much of it I envied him. The control of its ending I suppose had an effect. Moreso though I think it was another story I’d been told. Dorothy, his wife of 60+ years, at nearly 90 herself would spend 2 half days every so often – as rainfall dictated – riding the John Deere lawnmower over the still self-tended acreage surrounding their home. And one day only perhaps a month earlier she’d welcomed Harold’s brother Russ and his wife to the farm one afternoon when they came calling. Russ asked after Harold and Dorothy told him that Harold had gone out to the garden a few hours ago and hadn’t come back in.
Russ went looking for his brother to find him flat on his back between rows of corn. He’d raised up when he heard Russ approaching and said he’d gotten tired and laid down to rest his eyes is all. Of course, his heart had nearly given out that day but he didn’t want anyone to worry. Harold was one of those guys who’d never want to trouble anyone about anything.
Harold’s funeral wasn’t. No obituary to speak of. The funeral home that took charge of picking up his body put this up on their website: “Harold died Sunday September 16, 2018 at the Custer Regional Hospital. Private burial will be held.” No fuss, no muss.
The windswept cemetery occupies a rise on the plains. Nothing recently man made is visible or nearby. Harold’s plot is oriented so he faces the homestead his grandparents settled and where his napping garden is. His parents lay in town but Harold wanted to be buried out there where his grandparents are and where few who cause any troubles for anyone anymore are too. I imagine if there’s a epitaph on the no doubt simple stone that will mark his resting place it will be something like “here lies a humble man”. To what more can one aspire.
My last post was over a year ago — a year that passed pretty quickly. Time speeding up seems to go with the territory of being double nickels now, as someone recently told me I was. I hit 55 a couple months ago which makes me old enough to recall when that was the national speed limit…at least for those states that couldn’t wean themselves from the federal highway funding feedbag. Oh so long ago.
I’ve been frustrated recently by those usurious bastards that go by the all-too-respectful name bankers. So I got motivated to vent a bit here.
Throughout my investing life I’ve often carried large balances on credit cards/lines at low interests rates in favor of leaving assets in investment accounts that were gaining more than I was paying in interest. I think it was really just a bit of a convenient justification for living beyond my means. But, it actually sort of worked. I saw my net worth climb and climb….the unsecured debt did as well – but, my finance background told me that was not necessarily a bad thing.
Recently I’m not sure it was the most excellent strategy I thought it was. I’m not sure yet. But, I’m facing some challenges that were not foreseen and I’ve been trying to decide on next steps…all the while also trying to figure out who to blame. In the spirit of most in our consumerist society, I’ve decided it’s not my fault I’ve racked up some serious debt that’s becoming less and less economically wise.
Here’s the dilemma. Upon retiring, and divorcing, my income dropped significantly. Not unexpected of course. But, how to make it match up with expenses is the trick that I found myself becoming less and less able to perform. I’ve always readily met my obligations albeit by leaning on easy money from willing bankers. It’s funny that I always naively thought in some warm and fuzzy way that they were loaning me money cuz I was a smart and reliable guy. I mean…top secret security clearance, 25+ years serving the nation..etc. I deserved it… – when I thought about it long enough….what the hell – deserved it?…. – to pay those crooks even the low rates I was paying when they were getting virtually free money from the fed on the back of our taxes… — ok, let’s leave it at I participated in the system.
So, where was I?
Ah yes, unable to readily perform the tricks. Well, I found my credit score – and credit lines creeping downwards due to increasing debt to income ratios. And, too, my previously friendly interest rates conversely began to creep up.
When this began to occur I thought to myself that they surely simply didn’t understand.
I have significant retirement assets, life insurance and equity in real estate …but, my banks could care less and are uninterested in loaning me money although I have a 35 year history of great credit.
So, I’m about to start tapping my retirement assets and incurring penalties because I’m under 59 1/2. I’m frustrated because although I’m willing to pay these usurious bloodsuckers they’re no longer willing to make loans to me.
Just out of spite I’ve even considered filing bankruptcy. Although I’ve never considered that an honorable thing to do — it seemed like a reasonable weapon against the stacked system. The rub is that the courts only let you keep a modest amount of equity on your home. That whole line about getting to keep your home when you go thru bankruptcy…. – well it’s only if your home has little or no equity. Ironically, I found the equity is less liquid than the retirement accounts….you can’t borrow against it unless you have income to pay the loan back….using a portion of the loan proceeds to make the loan payments seemed perfectly reasonable to me – but not to the UBs (usurious bastards)……heavy sigh.
So, at the end of the vent…all I’m left with is drawing on the retirement income and paying the penalties…. – or going back to work. Which I’m giving thought to…not any type of serious job with real responsibilities….just something to keep my poker habit from forcing me into liquidating my savings. I was thinking Walmart greeter—but, I just saw today that Walmart parking lots are where Trump is more and more often stopping by to stir the folks up….I just couldn’t take that.
dipsnewlife 